If there is H2O on the inside of a fire hydrant, what is on the outside? Kitty Perry How do you catch a fish without a fishing pole? Dingo One day a lady took a dingo to the vet. The first one is on the house. It has been a half an hour since I sent him to look for another leopard and he's not back yet! A: A Great Dane out! Q: What do you call a black Eskimo dog? A: They both have collar I. A: In the barking lot. Cats have to have their own private basket, or they won't go at all.
A: Barkeology Q: Why do dogs wag their tails? Q: Where do you find a dog with no legs? Thanks for being a kind, thoughtful person who has respect for all. A: He was trying to fetch a boomerang! The vet rushes him back to an examination room and puts his dog down on the examination table. Q: What kind of dress shoe does Michael Vick wear? A: Because he cant make a fist Q: Why does the dog bring toilet paper to the party? I got rid of my husband. A dog knows when you're sad. What do you get when you cross a chick with an alley cat? Q: What did the cat say to the dog? It was a bit choppy. Why did a person with an unspayed female cat have to go to court? The monkey goes to the leopard's den and tells him everything, in the hope that he will become his friend and protector.
She is an amazing creature. Mount on my back, lead me to him and I will be forever in your favor! Why is it so hard for a leopard to hide? One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor. Regardless of the temptation, don't lick a steak knife. If man evolved from monkeys and apes, why do we still have monkeys and apes? The vet goes into the back room and comes out with a cat and puts the cat down next to the dog's body. Cats will drop a dead mouse in your slippers. If you spin an oriental man in a circle three times, does he become disoriented? Cats are like potato chips. Q: What state do dogs like? Q: Why did the dog stay in the shade? When you take them for a ride, dogs will sit on the seat next to you.
If you had to specify, in one word, why the human race has not, and will never achieve its full potential, that word would be meetings. Q: How did the little Scottish dog feel when he saw a monster? Q: Did you hear about the zoo where the only exhibit was a dog? A: A dog that can lick you from the other side of the road! He has taken advantage of me on my territory! The man, clearly agitated and not willing to accept this, demands a second opinion. Q: What do you call a dog that swallows a ball? A: Cause you can't grow a tree without bark. Q: Why do all dogs go to Heaven? So stop complaining and start laughing at these jokes. We are a fun loving group of pet owners. Because it was afraid of the bark! I bark every day of my life. Q: Why did a dog enter the church in the middle of a religious mass? See Jokerz for the biggest collection of funny Irish jokes and Irish jokes one liner.
What happens when it rains cats and dogs? With the lady still in shock, the doctor handed the bill to the lady. What do you call a dog magician? A man runs into the vet's office carrying his dog, screaming for help. Okay, so maybe we are. Every time I sat on his lap he bit me! Search in the largest collection of one liners and puns. A: I don't know but I'll join in if it laughs! They start out as milk, and it's up to women to mold them until they turn into something acceptable to have dinner with. Q: What do dogs eat for breakfast? A: Bark Q: How does a dog stop a video? Firstly, our researcher who compiled them clearly has kids and probably got a kick out of reciting these jokes for them. Cats will still be mad at you for leaving in the first place.
I can hardly contain myself. Have you seen the size of my dog? Judy Helm Wright is a Pet Grief Coach and animal advocate. If any dog tells you he can, he is lying through his teeth. Q: What do you call a cross between a matador and a cute little puppy dog? The cat walks from head to tail poking and sniffing the dog's body and finally looks at the vet and meows. Q: What do you get if you cross a sheepdog with a jelly? We need animals to take away the monotony of humanity and to make the world a little more tolerable. A: Because you can't bury them in trees! How did a cat take first prize at the bird show? Q: Why do dogs bury bones in the ground? Cutter is the local Veterinarian, known for his wry humor. .
A: His bark was much worse than it's bite! This is my Seeing-Eye dog. Because they swim in schools. Tree: Do you like bark? One morning Dan was driving his car down a busy street when to his surprise he saw ahead of him a fellow running full force with 2 big dogs after him. Q: What is a dog's favorite food? Frantic that they may get sued, Joe quickly sent one of his underlings out to town to buy a dog that looked exactly the same. What do you call the cat that was caught by the police? If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done? A: It barked with de-light! Q: What do you call a frozen dog? Q: What does my dog and my phone have in common? What do you get when you cross a chick with an alley cat? Q: How is a dog and a marine biologist alike? It was all so different before everything changed. You could send another 'Woof' for the same price. What did the tree say to the dog? If all is not lost, where is it? A man and his wife were going for a stroll one night when they spotted what was obviously a blind man taking a walk on the other side of the street with his seeing eye dog.
A: Because he did not want to turn into a hot dog. Just in the nick of time the underling arrived with the dog They quickly switched dogs and breathed a sigh of relief. Q: What was the special offer at the pet store this week? One Liner Jokes We have covered some classic one-liners before on this site, everywhere from our to our. Through the World Wide Web. Are they afraid someone will clean them? Would a fly without wings be called a walk? A: A pit bull in a park. Mustard, its the best thing for a hot dog! A: Right where you left him.
But where can you find an elephant with one hand? Q: What did the angry man sing when he found his slippers chewed up by the new puppy? An Investigator What do you call a pile of kittens A meowntain What do you call a bee that lives in America? Q: What do you call a dog magician? We have lots of fun together. It's not hard to meet expenses. What do you call a rabbit with fleas? What do you call a cat that lives in an igloo? Q: Why did the dog bury himself in the back yard? I never do anything weird with her, except that I let her smell my crotch once in a while. Because she wanted to be a first-aid kit Why did the snowman call his dog Frost? Q: What do you call a dog with a fever? When you come home from work, your dog will be happy and lick your face. Chicken Caeser Salad Chicken Sees A Salad Did you hear about the old chameleon that couldn't change colour? Here is a silly collection of some of the cat jokes I could find on the internet. The dog panics, but he sees bones on the ground and has an idea.